The highest point of the year gone by 2015, for me, was its last month.
Loads of things were happening at a very high speed in December, but one thing that kept me pleasantly preoccupied was a reunion with few friends from good old college days. The warm memories, the anticipation to recreate the carefree atmosphere from back then, the curiosity to know more about them than what’s put on FB… the whole cocktail of emotions was so potent, that it kept me heady … that too without an iota of any kind of spirit!
It’s been 11 years since we parted our ways. I was so looking forward to feel young again… to actually roll on floor laughing (not just type ROFL )… to talk (sense/ nonsense) non-stop… to dare to do something stupid…in a nutshell I longed to catch a glimpse of the madness that Manipal had been for us!
While recreating this madness I hoped to be able to find that streak of craziness, spontaneity, passion, wildness… which I call “the keeda”(literal meaning is worm), which I feel is lost within me, subdued by “life”. It was this keeda which added zing and drama to my life back then. It was because of this keeda each moment was fuller than expected. It was the drive for the unexpected to happen.
And then… it got lost. It was time to grow up and take responsibility! Compromises and logic shut its voice down. Routine and more responsibility took away its fangs. It was made docile… but I know for sure it isn’t dead! I feel it wriggling sometimes trying to awaken from its latency. Whenever i felt cornered it would nudge me to do something random but reasoning would prevail. Or when surrounded by the vast expanse of the sea or mountains I could feel it stir. In eleven years, “time” and “life” have helped me find more aspects of myself which I didn’t think I had in me. I feel secure, confident and whole but I miss my keeda. it’s time now for my mature self to befriend the keeda again.
Reunion was the perfect setting! It was to be the reunion of us four friends from a lager group of 11 …and hopefully my keeda too.
We met. We talked.We laughed. We recounted umpteen number of flashbacks from college. We exchanged gifts. We bared our scars. We shared our dreams. We rejoiced. We celebrated. It was all so organic. there was no awkwardness. We took off from where we left. It was magical. It was therapeutic. Oh yes! We had our share of drama too! 3 days passed away in a whiff!
We are back to our battlegrounds. I feel more refreshed than normal vacation (though we do much more in them). I feel proud of my girls… let’s face it, we have faced many a storms and that’s not stopped us from sailing! I feel immensely grateful to be able to meet my friends again. I hope we are able to make it little more frequent and not wait for another 11 years, and next time maybe meet our larger group.
As for the keeda I have a new one which is determined to find my old one.